


Yuzuvier ficlet collection

by noname_noname



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: (everything written is an au though), AU, All details regarding each ficlet are in the notes, Each chapter is a separate ficlet, English is not my native language, Ficlet, Ficlet Collection, Fluff, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-10-17 10:07:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10591800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noname_noname/pseuds/noname_noname
Summary: One chapter - one ficlet. There's no connection between ficlets unless otherwise stated.NO connection to reality! NO insult intended! Peace, love, figure skating)English is not my native language, so there are mistakes probably.UPD: there's 5th ficlet now)





	1. Why

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just today I saw an article (or smth like that) where was said that Yuzu always need to know the reason of everything (or, shorter, "why"). So then one early-yuzuvier thought came to my mind...
> 
> Timeline: probably some time after Yuzu moved to Toronto, so it must be 2012-2013 season.

**Why**

Behind Yuzuru’s back Javi calls him “Mr. Why”— now, when period of “yeah-yeah-yeah” has come to an end, almost every offer (and even some statements) is met with inevitable “why”. But if Brian always tries to explain (though sometimes it leads to the well-known “yeah-yeah-yeah”, which means “I have no idea what the hell you are talking about”), Javi is always taken aback.

“Let’s go for a walk.” — “Why?”

And Javi doesn’t know what is the answer.

“Let’s startle Brian with a “boo” from around the corner?”—“Why?”

Well, right, that was silly…

 

But there is one case when Yuzuru doesn’t bash him with “why”. When after the practice they both come to the lock room — all sweaty, with wet t-shirts stuck to them — and Javi asks: “May I help you?” — Yuzuru just raises his hands up and lets him do so.

 

_11 Apr 2017_


	2. Like Falling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Timeline: after the Worlds 2017  
> Emotional Hurt/Comfort

**Like Falling**

This time the banquet was not so fun for Javi. Although everything went as usual, and no one actually cared that yesterday he missed not only the gold, but the whole podium, Javi himself realized it very well now. And it was not a nice feeling absolutely.

If he could, he’d probably not go at all, but he had some liabilities… and a three-piece suit flew with him from Canada not to lie peacefully in a suitcase, that’s for sure. In the end Javi was glad he went there — music, and snacks, and fellow skaters — all that made him feel better.

But then the wine he drunk was enough, and all the photos were made — both with those he wanted to, and those who wanted to (these were more numerous), — and the music became too loud… and Javi retreated.

He was about to come back to his hotel room, but changed his mind and decided to get on a roof instead — there was said to be a place with a hot tub. He was lucky — the door was opened. Said tub was empty, of course, but he hadn’t planned to take it all the same. All he needed were fresh air and a solitary place.

So he stood there near the railing, recalling again and again his free skate — and screams and cheering some 30 or so minutes beforehand when Yuzu got his brand new world record. Javi was happy for him with all his heart, he knew how much Yuzu worked for this gold and how much it meant for him. But the happiness had a bitter taste. If only Javi could grab the silver! He actually didn’t mind lose to Yuzu sometimes, but yesterday he lost not only to him, but as well to Shoma and Boyang overall. He missed the silver — bronze, actually, — missed the podium, missed an opportunity to stay beside Yuzu while listening to his anthem…

 

He couldn’t say for how long he stood there, when he heard so familiar footsteps. Javi didn’t turn around, but sad thoughts faded waiting for his dear rival to come closer.

Yuzu came behind him and put his arms around. Javi breathed out and pressed himself against Yuzu’s breast.

“It feels like falling”, said Javi softly after what seemed an eternity.

“I know”, answered Yuzu. “But I am hold you. Always.”

“Thank you”, breathed out Javi with a weak smile on his lips and closed his eyes.

 

_13.04.2017_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Illustration](https://www.scandichotels.com/imagevault/publishedmedia/j5p15mel495wqy3bo61d/Scandic-Park-Helsinkir-relax-hot-tub-roof-top001.jpg) to the "hot tub on the roof" from the Scandic Park Helsinki site.


	3. The One To Hold You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Timeline: after the Boston 2016  
> Emotional hurt/comfort
> 
> Triggers: bad dreams, health issues, Boston 2016

**The One To Hold You**

 

This time it’s harder to live through his defeat. Maybe this is so because it’s second time in a row. Maybe because this season he hasn’t had a surgery, and though his problematic foot hurts a lot, it seems to be a less convincing reason to lose the gold.

Or maybe he just fears that this season has been the last one in his skating career.

Yuzu feels lost. Waiting for the medics’ verdict, looking over all the medals won during his senior years (there are too few bright yellow ones to his taste), talking to his mom — or to father and sister on Skype, a strange feeling can’t leave him. It feels like falling.

 

Ironically it’s only when the doctor tells him he will skate again — if he follows doctor’s orders, — Yuzu for the first time sees a dream where he is falling. It’s a dark space with nothing to see, so it should be impossible to tell if he’s moving at all. But Yuzu knows very well that he’s falling in this darkness — from nowhere to nowhere. It’s not scary, and hardly can be classified as a nightmare, but when Yuzu awakens, he is panting and his heart is about to leap from his chest

He decides not to bother his mom with these dreams.

 

But when one day Javi — his rinkmate, his rival who lately for the second time took the gold he missed… his friend — appears at the door of his Toronto apartment, Yuzu’s “feel of falling” somehow pulls back. Probably that’s why he decides to share his problem with Javi.

They sit at the kitchen. Javi is busy with a teapot while Yuzu absent-mindedly thinks whether it should be his duty or not (well, Javi definitely doesn’t mind to make tea).

“You’re not okay”, states Javi when they both, sitting opposite each other, try to sip hot tea smelling of chamomile, lemongrass and something else.

Yuzu thinks it’s the right time.

“I have dreams any… some?.. time. They are…”

He furrows his brows trying to find right words.

“Bad? Do you have nightmares?” asks Javi with worry.

“It’s not… It’s not feel bad. But I am falling. In these dreams I falling, and falling, and falling, and feels like forever…”

Yuzu flinches remembering that utterly unpleasant feeling, and a moment later Javi lays his hand over Yuzu’s.

“Look at me,” asks Javi, and only then Yuzu realizes that he has hypnotized his cup for some time.

He looks up and meets Javi’s hazel eyes radiating comfort and confidence.

“You trust me, don’t you?”

Yuzu does.

“You won’t fall. I will catch you no matter what. Don’t be afraid, okay? When you’re falling just remember that I will catch you. Okay?”

“Okay”.

Yuzu’s lips curve into a little smile though he doesn’t clearly understand how Javi can catch him in his dream. Javi looks concerned — he’s evidently not satisfied with Yuzu’s “okay”. So Javi stands up and moves to Yuzu’s side.

“I will catch you”, repeats Javi and puts his arms around Yuzu. “Like this. You can’t fall when I hold you. And I’m always here to hold you.”

Yuzu nods. He begins to understand.

 

Next time when Yuzu is falling through the darkness he suddenly feels that someone catches his hand. He looks up (if there’s any “up” in a space with no directions) and sees confident eyes of Javi. Javi pulls him up and cuddles him. And the dark space disappears yielding to peaceful dreams.

 

_15 Apr 2017_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Easter to all who celebrate it!


	4. The End Is The New Beginning (of The Season)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's the latest "newsbreak" brought me back to writing (hi, Akiko).

**The End Is The New Beginning (of The Season)**

 

Olympic season is coming, and the feeling is in the air, though the figure skating season has just finished. There are no new programs yet, nothing to speculate about, and yet… Olympic season is coming. That means — no one will wait through the off-season to start plotting and gracefully dish the dirt (the latter is usually goes under mask of constructive criticism). It’s not skaters’ business, of course, but the ones’ behind them. There’s no guarantee that all the words of coaches, experts and “experts”, former skaters, former officials and anyone else will have any impact on the results, and yet the words will be said.

Surely not all teams and federations play this PR game, but surely every single one of them has its own strategy.

Now, weeks after not-so-lucky Worlds Javi even feels a bit blessed as it’s not him in the public limelight. The defeat, as bitter as it is, gives its odds. But it’s not pleasant at all to see all side-effects of the victory, weighing down on Yuzu.

Of course it’s quieter here in Toronto — or, rather, in the Cricket Club, — but Yuzu tends to keep up with figure skating news, so maybe there’s not so much difference. Javi has suggested him to entrust this to his team, but when Yuzu thinks that he has to do anything, he will do it anyway.

 

They have just left the ice and now are slowly walking off to change their clothes. Yuzu scrolls through some news on his phone — or maybe it’s Twitter feed — and wrinkles his nose.

“What’s up?” asks Javi, but Yuzu pretends not hearing him. Javi doesn’t insist.

Later Javi checks his Twitter and thinks he’s lucky enough not to have a pursuer in his own country. Mudslinging is not a nice thing as it is, but when it comes to infighting it seems even worse.

 

He catches Yuzu it the parking lot, heading to the bus stop.

“You know it’s a crap, right?”

Yuzu looks at him askance and snorts:

“Didn’t know you studying Japanese so well”.

“Do you really think it’s not translated yet?” counters Javi. “Your huge fan base, you know”.

Yuzu shrugs and Javi notices that his shoulders are tense. Maybe he hasn’t expected Olympic chase to start _so_ soon.

They walk alongside to the bus stop in silence. Javi knows that Yuzu will recover soon — he always does, — but it’s maddening not to know how to help.

But does he really not know?

They’re in the bus already when Javi seems to understand he knows how.

“I’m always here to support you. You know that, don’t you?”

“Do we not rivals?” Yuzu quirks his lips a bit, but the tension leaves him.

“You are my greatest and dearest rival. Where would I be without you?”

It’s when the words fall Javi understands that he has actually meant each of them.

And then Yuzu smiles.

“I’m so happy you here, Javi”.

Javi thinks that “I’m always here for you” will be too cheesy and just hugs him instead of answer.

 

Olympic season is coming, but there’s nothing they couldn’t cope with.

 

_26 Apr 2017_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But really, it's _April_! Can't they wait till, dunno, August with their intrigues?


	5. The Sky Is No Limit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many talks and reflections on future.
> 
> Timeline: this summer, when Javi came back to Toronto

When Javi looks at Yuzuru's training — no matter whatever he is training, it may be just skating skills — he sees more. Not just a skater getting ready for a season-long battle, not just a friend with a bright mind and shiny eyes. Not a Japan hope, not a rival, not… There is more. Now, when Yuzu is — at last! — confident enough, Javi can see his friend’s way clearly. And it scares him, the way he sees. Maybe because he himself has never been so brave — or so sure. Maybe because this way will inevitably pull him and Yuzu apart — more, and more, and more…

 

It takes Yuzu few days to make a decision and ask Javi directly (Javi has no doubt that the Japanese noticed his somewhat gloomy mood at once).

“What is wrong?”

“Nothing.”

And that’s no lie — nothing is wrong, Javi just doesn’t like the way things are going.

Yuzu isn’t impressed.

“Javi is not yourself. What is wrong?”

Javi can’t help but smile at that. And, well, at least Yuzu _cares_.

“Just had some thoughts about future and… y’know…” Javi trails off, not knowing how to put into words everything he feels.

“Bad thoughts? About Olympics? Javi hurt?”

“No, I’m fine”, Javi pulls a smile. “It’s more about… like, you are aiming high up, higher and higher. And I’m staying back. There’s an abyss between us now, you know?”

“Javi is fool! There’s no abyss!” flares Yuzu, and Javi corrects himself quickly:

“Sorry, not between us, but between our skating. I’m hardly a rival for you now.”

“Javi is fool,” repeats Yuzu, somewhat desperately now. Of course he’s not blind and he’s smart, he can see Javi’s prospects well — as Javi can see his.

 

For some minutes they keep quiet. Then Yuzu speaks again:

“Why Javi not follow me?”

“Yuzu, you probably missed that I’m four years older, y’know?” softly chuckles Javi.

“Three years and a half,” corrects him Yuzu. “And what? If Javi being healthy, why not? Why pulling back?”

“I’m not pulling back! It’s just… I’m not getting younger, y’know? And there are limits…”

“But how can you know where limits are if not trying?” interrupts him Yuzu.

Javi stares at him, having lost his thought.

“Is this your reason to carry on? To go up, higher, to challenge things that no one before you even thought to challenge?” he asks.

“Yes. Mostly,” Yuzu nods. “For Javi not.”

It’s not a question, but Javi agrees:

“We are different. Always been. I’m probably more… cautious, y’know.”

“We are different,” echoes Yuzu. “Maybe that’s why we fit in. But it’s sad…”

Yuzu doesn’t finish his thought, but Javi understands. The very reason for his not-so-bright mood last days.

 

They keep silence again. This time it’s Javi who speaks first.

“What will you do if you reach your limit one day?”

“I will stop.”

“And if not? I mean, if you won’t reach limits? If you really _haven’t_ limits — or if they’re so far, or aside, or I don’t know where, but if you never reach them?”

“Then I will go on.”

“To the stars?”

“What Javi means?”

“I don’t know… You’re just… so distant. I can’t reach you.”

“Javi tired now,” Yuzu puts his hand on Javi’s shoulder. “I’m here. Not distant. Close to Javi.”

Javi doesn’t answer.

“Javi will take a rest — not now, after Olympics. And then come back?”

Unsaid “to me” hangs in the air between them — something too romantic for this talk.

“Then I will need to catch up. Not only with you, but with the others, those youngsters…” Javi probably feels really old at that moment.

“Never know what will be after Olympics. Who stays, who goes. And the rules will change,” Yuzu looks at him with so much hope, so Javi thinks that maybe all his problems exist in his imagination only.

“It’s not scary,” says Yuzu again. “Reaching for the limits is not scary. Javi can try.”

“I think,” slowly says Javi, starting to understand one thing, “I think I’m afraid to reach it. My limit. One thing is to know theoretically that somewhere there’s a, erm, wall which is impossible for me to break. And completely different thing is to reach that wall.”

“Javi is not a coward,” says Yuzu.

_And what if I am?.._ thinks Javi somewhat desperately.

“Javi is not a coward,” says Yuzu again, as if overhearing Javi’s thought. “Javi just had no… guidance when young.”

“So… you want to be my guide? You will reach for the stars, and I will reach for you?” Javi is not sure what does he feel. He honestly has never thought about that.

“Javi agrees?” Yuzu looks at him inquiringly.

“I will think about it, I promise,” says Javi. “The idea is… appealing, apparently. Maybe because it’s you…” Javi smiles, unsure how it sounds.

“I want to have Javi beside me,” says Yuzu firmly. “And there’s no abyss.”

Javi chuckles and says nothing.

But it’s comforting talk. Maybe Yuzu is right and Javi just needs to have some rest — and then come back and try to reach for his star. His bright Japanese star.

 

_17.08.2017_


End file.
